西甲电视剧剧本大全——西甲剧本5分钟
今天运困体育就给我们广大朋友来聊聊西甲电视剧剧本大全,希望能帮助到您找到想要的答案。
英文短剧本5到10分钟
Scene 1
(In the restaurant, a man and a woman are having coffees)
Siu Ming: Well, sweetie, you know, I am really thankful that I haveyou beside me for so many years…I love you.
Rose: (Smile) Honey, I love you too.
Siu Ming: I know you do. Listen, I’ve been thinking about this formonths seriously…sweetie, will you marry me
Rose: Oh! What a surprise! How sweet! But dear, I need to thinktwice about it…you know, I’m pretty serious about marriage.
Siu Ming: Yeah, yeah, certainly. So…
Rose: (Drinking the coffee) Oh my god! This is so disgusting!
Siu Ming: Oh dear, are you OK
Rose: No I’m not OK! (Angry) OK…I’m sorry but I don’t haveconfidence in our future because you can’t even find a decent restaurant forthis important moment. I’m sorry. Bye-bye. (run away)
Siu Ming: Sweetie…how can this be… It must be the coffee! (lookingaround) Where is the manager (turn to William) You are in trouble!
Scene 2
(Greeting)
Daniel: Good morning ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to Eaties’ Grouphead office! I’m Daniel (Corporate Communication Department Manager).(greeting)
Joyce: This is Joyce (Human Resources Manager).
Arthur: Oh, regular weekly meeting again! I’m Arthur (CorporateConsultant). Nice to meet you all.
Emily: Good day. This is Emily (Coffee Specialist). I seldom attendmeetings…I’m more technical in a sense. But they just need me present today…(drink coffee)
William: I am William, I’m managing the Eaties’ Café chain. UsuallyI don’t need to be here. (worried) But this time I think I’m in trouble…Oh, itseems that the meeting is about to start, wish me good luck!
Scene 3
(In Meeting Room One, meeting in progress)
Daniel: OK we are done with the routine stuff. Now let’s come to thespecial issues about Eatie’s Café…A gentleman is complaining that our coffee failshim in proposing to a lady. And he’s trying to make us liable to that.
Emily: Oh… I believe that we have the best Brazilian coffee beans.
Joyce: I am not looking forward to receiving a letter from thesolicitor. Let’s get to the point real quick. Who manages the café, and who madethe coffee
William: I am the manager, and a trainee made the coffee…We hiredhim last week.
Joyce: Ah ha, so you are the one.
William: I’m sorry that I didn’t train him very well. I will takethis responsibility.
Joyce: I have told you. How can this happen How can you be amanager You should never let a trainee make coffees or prepare food. This willonly cause trouble. The best solution would be to fire that trainee and we’llget you downsized. I believe the customer would be pleased to accept ourapology.
(Silence)
William: OK if this is the only solution…
Arthur: It’s OK, we won’t put all the blame on you. To be fair, itis extremely funny that not getting married because of a cup of coffee. Wecan’t be liable to that, right
(Everybody laughs except William and Joyce)
Daniel: Frankly speaking, the fault is on William’s side coz he didnot provide adequate training to the new-hired staff. But of course, we have toadmit that most of our stores cannot afford to do that either. We didn’t givethem the resources.
Arthur: Can we do this We can implement a new policy. From now on onlytrained baristas can brew coffee. They have to go through internal training andqualification test to be a barista.
Joyce: But this would probably increase our workload. We will haveto train the staff all from nothing. We need to put a lot more resources inthat. Why can’t we simply fire the ones who are responsible and let this end
Daniel: Joyce, of course there would be costs. But providingtraining is also a good way to minimize our liability in the future.
Arthur: Well, having five of us sitting here to solve problems alsocost us time and money in a way.
Emily, Daniel: Haha, that’s true.
Daniel: So, good news for you, William. You can keep your position!
(The meeting is over, and the minutes is shown on screen 5-10s)
Scene 4
(In the office)
Daniel: (looking at the business letter) What do you think, Arthur
Arthur: It looks good.
Daniel: Great. So we’ll send it out today!
(camera turns to the memo)
William: (looking at the memo) Oh I can’t believe this. I was notpunished…
Emily: No, you were. See, your workload is increased. You’ll beresponsible for arranging the tests for everybody who works at the café. Andyou will have to pass the test and get the qualification yourself too.
William: I’m not afraid of that! But I’m sorry that your workloadhas been increased because of this incident…
Emily: Haha, it’s OK. I love coffee. (smile) But you really need tobe more careful when you hire new staff next time!
应该会是5分钟，算上你们讲得比较慢的话，7分钟左右
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本（通用5篇）
话剧指以对话方式为主的戏剧形式，于19世纪末20世纪初来到中国。与传统舞台剧、戏曲相区别，话剧主要叙述手段为演员在台上无伴奏的对白或独白，但可以使用少量音乐、歌唱等。以下是我整理的5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本，欢迎阅读。
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本 篇1
The Clever Rabbits（聪明小兔）
角色：
Red Eyes（红眼睛）Long Ears（长耳朵）Short Tail（短尾巴）
Big Wolf（大灰狼）Mother Rabbit（兔妈妈）
Storyteller翻译官
道具 房子，玩具、凳子，桌子，一棵树等。
布景 一座有门的房子里摆着一张桌子、几个凳子和一些玩具。
SceneI Three Rabbits（三只小兔子）
（一）
Storyteller:The Mother Rabbit has red Eyes,Long Ears and Short Tail.
兔妈妈有三个孩子，她给他们起名叫红眼睛、长耳朵和短尾巴。）
Red Eyes:（Coming to the front.上前。）
Hello!I"m Red Eyes.Glad to see you.
（你好！我是红眼睛。见到你很高兴。）
Long Ears:（Touch his long ears.着他的长耳朵。）
Hi!How do you do Nice to see you.My name is Long Ears.
（嗨！你好！很高兴见到你。我叫长耳朵。）
Short Tail:（Show his tail.展示他的尾巴。）
Hello,boys and girls! I"m Short Tail.
（小朋友们，你们好！我是短尾巴。见到大家我很高兴。）
After this,they are playing games in随后，他们就在房子里玩游戏。）
（二）
Storyteller:A big wolf is hiding be-idea.Just then,the Mother Rabbit is the arm.
（一只大灰狼正躲在树后，他在打着坏主意。这时，兔妈妈提着一篮子萝卜回来了。） Mother Rabbit:（Singing a song.唱起了歌。） Little Rabbits,open the door.
（小兔子乖乖，把门开开，妈妈回来了。）
Big Wolf:Ah,I know their secret.啊，我知道他们的秘密了。）
Mother Rabbit:（Walking into the house.进了家门。）
Good evening,my children.Are you hungry
Let"s have supper!
（晚上好，孩子们！你们饿了吧？咱们吃晚饭吧。）
Storyteller: The Big Bad Wolves（大灰狼来了）
Storyteller:Then next day,the（第二天，兔妈妈要出门了。）
Mother Rabbit:I am going to pick the door ,don"t open the door for strangers （我要去采蘑菇。千万记住，不要给陌生人开门。）
All:OK.
Storyteller:Three rabbits close the a while,they hear some one knocking at door.
Big Wolf:（Learn to sing.学着唱。）Little Rabbits,open the door.
Mother coming back.
（小兔子乖乖，把门开开，妈妈回来了。）
Red Eyes and Short Tail:Mother is（妈妈回来了。）
Long Ears:（Stop them opening the阻止他俩开门。）No.It"s not our mother.That isn"t like Mother"s voice. （不对。不是妈妈，那不像妈妈的声音。）
Red Eyes:Let me see.It"s not really（让我来看看。果然不是妈妈。）
Big Wolf:（Bang!Bang!Bang!）I"m your mother.Open the door in a hurry.
（我是你们的妈妈，快开门啊。）
Long Ears:All right.You must show your tail.
（好吧。那你必须把你的尾巴从门缝里伸进来）
Big Wolf:OK.
Storyteller:The clever rabbits clip the（小兔子把大灰狼的尾巴夹住了。）
Mother Rabbit:You Big Bad Wolf!（你这个大灰狼！）
Storyteller:With her words,she hits（说着，她捡起棍子狠狠地打大灰狼。）
Big Wolf:Oh.My God!My tail hurts.（噢。我的天啊！我的尾巴受伤了。）
Storyteller:The wolf"s tail is broken.
mother"s voice,they open the door and hug their mother.
（大灰狼的尾巴被夹断了，他逃走了。小兔子听到妈妈的声音，打开门，扑进妈妈的怀里。）
Mother Rabbit:My clever children.（我的乖孩子们。）
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本 篇2
旁白：It’s a cold evening. The Titanic has sunken. Rose, Jack and Oscar are on the life boat floating in the ocean. This is Jack. This is Rose and this is Oscar, her husband-to-be.（边说边介绍，三人坐在课桌上）
Oscar: Oh, honey~ Are you OK （边说边将手搭上Rose肩）
Jack: She is my girl.（打开Oscar的手）
Oscar: You are so cold.（脱下报纸披在R身上面向观众）what you wear, what you are.
Jack: What are you doing! （扔掉校服，脱下自己的羽绒服抖了抖，面向观众）BoSideng（波斯登）, warm and comfortable, it’s my choice.（将羽绒服披在Rose身上）
Rose:（向Jack）I love you.（向观众）But I love BoSideng more.
Oscar: Hey! She is my wife-to-be, who are you
Jack: I am I. Wo de di pan wo zuo zhu（我的地盘我做主）.
Oscar: People on the Earth all know, She, and I, will go to New York to have our wedding. Rose: But now……
Jack: Don’t say any more! Take your knife out! （从口袋里掏出铅笔，紧握手中）
Oscar: Ok. Let’s go fighting! （同样掏出铅笔紧握手中）
Jack & Oscar: Fighting! （用铅笔互戳）----小蜜蜂~
Rose: No, no, no! Please stop! （拉二人）( J & O不小心将Rose推下桌子——落水）
Rose: Help, help!（Jack & Oscar将拉上Rose桌子）
Oscar: Honey, how are you
Rose:（向观众）PiaoRou（飘柔）, just so confident~（甩头发）
（Rose不小心推Oscar，Oscar落水） Oscar: Help, help!
Rose: Oh, no! （向Oscar伸手）（Jack抓过Rose的`手，对视）
Jack:（唱）你是我的玫瑰，你是我的花…You are my life, you are my honey~
Rose: But……what about Oscar
Jack: Don’t pay attention to him.
Rose: OK. Darling~ I love you, loving you, like mouse love rice~
旁白：At this time, Oscar has been far away……Jack and Rose are still floating in the ocean. It’s colder and colder.
Jack: Do you feel cold
Rose: Yes. You see we are so lonely.
Jack: Don’t worry. I have this! （从口袋里掏出打火机，并向观众展示）This is a magic DaHuoji（打火机）.（Jack按下打火机）（Superwoman上，胸前贴一张纸，上书S）
Superwoman:（向观众）Do you know who am I I am Superwoman! The famous Superman is my brother. I’m willing to help others.
Rose: Would you please help us get awayfromhere（Superwoman无视，面向Jack）
Superwoman: Oh, pretty boy~ Come here, I will save you.
Jack: Take my girl together.
Superwoman: No way!（Superwoman下）（Jack第二次按下打火机）
（Indian Princess上，向观众合掌问候）
Princess: I am a princessfromIndia.
Rose: Would you please help us get awayfromhere
Princess: OK. I have a magic blanket, maybe it can take you away. Come on.（从口袋里掏出围巾）（Jack & Rose 尝试伸出脚，Princess上下晃动围巾）
Princess: Oh, no, it’s broken! My blanket! （边说边后退，渐远）
（Indian Princess下）（Jack第三次还没按，Harry Potter上，提着扫帚）
Harry: Yi Where am I （向观众）My name is Harry Potter. I’mfromHogwarts（霍格沃茨）. I lose my way.
Rose: Would you please help us get awayfromhere
Harry: I really want to help you, but my ability is limited.（耸肩）
Jack:（愤怒地）Oh, my god! Go away at once! （指向前方）（Harry Potter下）
旁白：Suddenly, the life boat is shaking because Jack and Rose are too heavy.
Jack: Rose, listen to me. I love you, but I will leave you.The boat can’t support us for
a long time. You must live, so I will jump into the sea.
Rose: No, no, no. Jump or not jump, this is a question.
Jack: Then let the God decide it（二人低头虔诚祈祷状）
Rose: God will bless us.（Jack和Rose同时从身后伸出手来，包剪锤）
Jack & Rose: One two three!（Jack出锤子，Rose出包子）
Jack: I lose. You see, it’s God’s choice.（Rose连连摇头）
Rose: Oh, no. Jack, Jack, why your name is Jack!
Jack: I wish you a happy life. Good-bye!（Jack跳下桌子，Rose伸手拉，未果）
Rose: You jump, I jump.（Rose跳下桌子，O未死， 继续叫救命……）
（旁白唱my heart will go on，音乐起，全剧终。Jack & Rose跳舞，张开手臂经典动作作结。）.
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本 篇3
人物： rabbit（小兔），fox（狐狸），monkey（小猴），tortoise（乌龟），mummy bear（熊妈妈），baby bear（熊宝宝），lion（狮子），bird（小鸟）。
布景：大森林背景，舞台右角是一座小房子，一棵木瓜树，中间有一棵大树，舞台左角有一块大石头，左角后台阶上有两棵桃树。
（大幕在抒情、优美的音乐声中徐徐开启）
:In this beautiful forest, There live many lovely animals, they love each other and live a happy life!
在一个美丽的大森林里，住着许许多多的小动物，他们在一起相亲相爱，生活得可幸福了！
第一景：小动物群舞
小兔舞 （音乐：活泼、轻快、跳跃）
狐狸舞 （扭动腰肢，跳节奏感极强的迪斯科）
乌龟舞 （一伸一缩，音乐：缓慢、低沉、滑稽）
小猴舞 （调皮、灵巧，可用西游记主题曲）
（音乐转为轻柔、舒缓，小兔一人旋转跳舞，音乐渐弱转为流水声，舞台灯光转暗，布景为湖边，木瓜树下。）
第二景：:"咕咚"（清晰而响亮）
小兔：（吃惊的样子，四处看看）What’s the matter
什么东西？
（倒退几步，拔腿就跑，正好撞上了狐狸。）
狐狸：（奇怪的神情）What’s the matter Why are you running
跑什么呀？出了什么事？
小兔：（气喘嘘虚的样子）："Gu dong, Gu dong is coming."
咕咚，咕咚来了。
狐狸：（害怕的样子）：Oh! Horrible, let’s run.
哇！太可怕了，让我们跑吧！
（这时候，熊妈妈提着篮子和熊宝宝从树后走出来，正好看到慌慌张张奔跑的小兔和狐狸。）
熊妈妈：（很惊奇的样子）：What’s the matter Why are you running
出了什么事？你们跑什么呀？
小兔、狐狸（合）：Gu dong is coming.
小熊：（害怕并躲在妈妈的怀里）mummy mummy, I’m frightened.
妈妈、妈妈，我害怕！
熊妈妈：（安慰宝宝）Oh! dear, Don’t be frightened, let’s run quickly.
乖宝宝，别害怕，让我们跑吧！快，快
（小猴、小鸟、乌龟在另一角台阶的桃树上看到，感到很奇怪）
小猴：（指着奔跑的小动物）Why Why are they all running
为什么，为什么他们都在跑？
乌龟：（很神秘的样子）Perhaps, A monster!
也许，是妖怪来了！
小猴、小鸟：（非常恐惧的样子）Oh, horrible, let’s run!
啊呀！太可怕了，快跑呀！
乌龟：（慌慌张张地跟在后面）wait! just wait.
等一等！
（大狮子正在一块石头下睡觉，众人吵吵闹闹的声音吵醒了它。狮子大吼一声，伸伸懒腰。）
狮子：（很生气的样子） It’s very noise! Why why are you all running
太吵了，你们为什么都在跑呀？
众人合：（上气不接下气的样子）Gu dong, Gu dong is coming.
狮子：（感到很奇怪）Gu dong , What is it Where is it
"咕咚",什么东西？在哪里？
（大家你看着我，我看着你，都在摇头。）
小猴：（问熊妈妈）Where
在哪里？
熊妈妈：（摇摇头，）I don’t know.（转而问狐狸）Where
我不知道。 在哪里？
狐狸：（摇摇头，）I don’t know.（转而问小兔）Where
我不知道。 在哪里？
（众人把目光都集中在小兔的身上。）
小兔：（挠挠脑袋，指着对面）It’s over there.
就在那边！
狮子：（很神气的样子）Let’s go and see.
走，去看看。
（大伙互相看看，都表现出非常害怕的样子。）
狮子：（拍拍胸脯，很勇敢的样子）come on, follow me.
走，跟我走！
（音乐响，一段雄壮有力的进行曲，众人排着整齐的队伍，大踏步地往前走，快到树下时，脚步慢下来。音乐停，全场一片寂静。）
狮子：（四处张望）Where There is nothing here.
在哪里？什么都没有啊！
（正在这时候，一阵风吹来，咕咚一声，一棵木瓜掉进了湖里。）
小猴：（指着湖边）Oh! It’s a papaya! Gu dong is a papaya!
噢！原来是木瓜呀！
（众人大笑，大幕在笑声中徐徐落下。）
The end.
全剧终
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本 篇4
甲:Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie Yeah, you are right, I'm the director-- Cameron Diaz, applaud , thank youRecently, I will direct a new movie called < Avatar 2 >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this film with famous actress---Anne Hathaway,OK, let's begin. At first , talent show, number one, let's welcome.
乙:(风情万种,妖娆妩媚地走进来,给观众一个飞吻):oh,honey,dear,sweet,darling director, the most beautiful charming, sexy girl is coming , every body knows me, right Yeah, I'm Nicole Kidman, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic dance show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,(打个响指) come some music.(搞笑舞,自由发挥). (跳完,鞠躬,向观众谢幕), thank you,(面向导演), honey, is it a wonderful performance
甲:(作目瞪口呆状),
乙:(在甲眼前晃手),oh, darling, are you Ok
甲:eh.my god, have you use some stimulant drugs this morning, you make my nerves nervous. Get out , next one.
乙:oh no .sweet ,you break my heart.(掩面离去)
丙:oh it seems to be serious. God bless me(画个十字架,镇定地走到甲面前,伸出手), nice to meet you, director.
甲:(与之握手),nice to meet you too,so, introduce yourself please.
丙:I'm Celine Dion, you know, I don't have too many achievements, I just won five Grammy awards, 12 World Music Awards, 7 American Music Awards , 21 Juno Awards and(做沉思状) oh, I forget it , a Oscar Award, (同学鼓掌,乙作安抚状),oh, calm down, calm down,it's just a piece of cake for me ,you know, I
甲:ok ,stop, time is limited, just begin
丙:OK! I'll use my first signature song to conquer you --my heart will go on, just enjoy it.
near, far, wherever you are
i believe that the heart does go on
once more, you opened the door(甲stop stop,丙不理,继续作深情状)
and you're here in my heart,
and my heart will go on and on.
甲:guard ,guard,help,drag this mad woman out.
Oh, I'm dying,hope the next one will give me a surprise
丁:(对着乙的背影,沉思状)to be,or not to be,it's a question!(走到甲面前牵起她的手做亲吻状),I'm glad to see you,my dear princess.
甲(做娇羞状):oh, it's really a big surprise,so what's your name
丁:My name Oh, wait a minute. Do you know Trish Regan(甲,白痴的摇头),eh,it's ok,then how about Robin Meade(摇头),and Melissa Theuriau(摇头),(丁,情绪激动),you know nothing, how can you sit in here.
甲(指门,气愤状),you you you.
丁:ok ok, it doesn't matter, you needn't learn about them, but you must know me, the most famous hostess who will catch up with those person and become the greatest poet---oprah!
甲:I don't care who you are, just show me your talent.
丁:ok ,listen,one poem,I have had found my best love, but I didn’t treasure her. When I lost her, I regret. It’s the most pain in the world. If God can give me another chance, I will say there words to her “I love you”!
甲(起鸡皮疙瘩状):oh, I can't stand, show you the door,
丁(转身离开,继续台词):If there is a time limit, I hope, it is (回头,对甲)10 thousand years.
甲:oh, it's really a terrible ,awful, horrible day,why it is such difficult to find an excellent actress.Oh, I'm dying,you three, come here,
三人跑进来,乙妩媚状:honey, you like my dance,right
丙镇静状:director,you like my singing,right
丁深情状:princess,you like my poet,right
三人同声:we are past,right
甲:ehThank you for your ehWonderful performance,but,I'm sorry to tell you (接电话) What Nobody comes here except they three,oh.god.(挂电话,低头),you three,(抬头),pass!
三人欢呼,说:we make it,we are superstar!
乙(甜蜜状):that's very sweet of you,we love you so much(飞个吻)
甲:you know, you are not good enough now, but I'm look forward to your progress.Do you have confidence
三人齐答:yes,we do!
甲伸手,三人搭上,同声,fight,fight,fight!
5分钟英语搞笑话剧剧本 篇5
人物：追星A, 追星B，追星C，明星，车主 旁白 经纪人
旁白：A girl is crazy about a star called Handsome+人名. Even when she is asleep, she can dream that man.
A：(打哈欠)，I need to go to bed, I’m so sleepy.(打哈欠)——边走边说 （趴在讲台上睡）
（进入梦乡）
旁白：In her dream……
(上台摆两个凳子，A做一个)
A：Oh, it’s a fine day. (假装看天) (然后突然不经意的拿起一本书翻看)
明星：(上台)：Oh, it’s a fine day. (然后坐凳子)
(A看着看着书，就不经意的往旁边看，然后再看看书，突然感觉不对劲，在意外的往旁边看，看到了自己最喜爱的那个明星，十分激动，不敢相信这是真的)
A：Are you … are you that … super star(激动地说不出话)
明星：（随意的回答） Yes, what’s wrong
A: I’m your fan,super fan. Your photos are full of my bedroom, no, they are full of my house, including kitchen, living room, bedrooms, and… and toilet.
(激动，后面讲到厕所时，还有点不好意思)
(当明星听到厕所时，很惊讶)
明星：You are too…enthusiastic [in,θju:zi'stik]. (有点嫌弃)
A: Can you give me your signature
(讲到签名，明星就兴奋了)
明星：Ok ,of course!
A：（大声喊）Oh ,I will have the Handsome’s signature
(突然，两个人跑过来，B把A给推开了然后两人问明星要签名)
B：Please ,please give me signature!
C: No, give it to me, to me!
(两人抢着，A一人孤零零的站在旁边，)
A: Why the result is this (抱头痛哭，边走边哭，然后走到睡觉的那个地方，恢复原来的样子，还有点啜泣)
A： Er Where is it Oh,it’s just a dream , but ,it’s a bad dream.
It’s too early, I want sleep.(又趴下去)
旁白：In her second dream, the scene is at the crossroads.
A: Look at the tall buildings, they like the …like the …I don’t have any adjrectives to describe them.
(明星上场，走在对面，也在欣赏某些东西)
A：Oh ,look at there, that man is like a star ! Oh ,Oh ,Oh ,(一次比一次激动)he is …he is…Handsome_！I want his signature! But there is too much cars, What can I do What can I do I don’t care this any more, the signature is more important!
(正当他准备过马路时，车主做开车动作来了，将要撞A，A很害怕)
车主：Look out!
Aon’t come here, don’t come here!(闭着眼睛) (车主迅速下台)
（A突然站起来，睁开眼睛）
A：A dream .too Oh, my god, Why do I always can’t get the signature No, I must get it, sleep again! Yes ,sleep! But ,why do I stand here I should lie in the bed. Whether these, I must go to bed and get the signature!(趴着又睡)
旁白：In her third dream
(明星在签名，A前面有B, C)
经纪人：One by one,Don’t be wrought-up
A: Yeah,I can get it at last. Before me ,there are only two people.
（到B）
B:I love you very much. My dreamlover.
明星：Thank you
(B下，C上)
C: Oh，I meet you ,can I hug with you
明星：Sure.
(两人抱了一下)
（到A）
A: I can get your signature in the end! I’m so excited
(明星面目有点难受的样子，手捂着肚子)
明星：Sorry, can I go to the toilet for a moment My stomach is hurt a lot.(难受)
A: Yes, make yourselfe at home.
(过来一会儿)
A: Handsome_ has gone to toilet for such a long time. Is he ok
经纪人对A说：Sorry, the girl, Handsome__ perhaps can’tcome here to give you signature, He is too hurt. He went home.
A: Ah Why always me (伤心地离开，走到睡着的地方)
（突然起身）
A :Why always me I only want a signature~~ ai~~ What time is it now (看了一下钟，表情惊讶) It’s near 8 o’clock .I can’t arrive at the school on time! Oh no ,hurry up hurry up!
;
逆转！4-1！西甲12亿豪门5分钟轰入2球，豪取5连胜，领跑积分榜
北京时间2月9日23点，西甲第23轮迎来一场比赛，总身价高达12亿欧元的西甲豪门皇马做客挑战奥萨苏纳。上半场，乌奈加西亚头球破门，为主队先拔头筹。伊斯科和拉莫斯在5分钟内连进2球帮助皇马反超比分。下半场，瓦拉内错失绝佳的补射破门机会。巴斯克斯和约维奇在最后时刻各进一球。最终，皇马4-1击败奥萨苏纳，豪取联赛5连胜，继续领跑积分榜。
皇马前22轮联赛取得14胜7平1负的成绩，力压巴塞罗那排名榜首。最近4轮联赛，皇马都取得了胜利。不过，皇马与塞维利亚、巴拉多利德、马竞的比赛都只是净胜对手1球，赢得有些惊险。在周中的一场国王杯1/4决赛中，皇马在主场以3-4输给皇家 社会 ，惨遭淘汰，爆出了一个大冷门。皇马需要迅速走出输球的阴影，避免在联赛也遭遇这种出人意料的失利。
比赛第4分钟，奥萨苏纳就借助主场优势发起进攻，库尔图瓦的神勇扑救化解险情。第14分钟，皇马丢球了！依靠一次角球机会，乌奈加西亚鱼跃头球攻门，顶出一个反弹球直奔球门右下角。角度太刁钻了，库尔图瓦就算把身体拉到极限也无法碰到皮球！这个进球让球场彻底沸腾了，全场球迷疯狂庆祝。第16分钟，本泽马获得一次绝佳机会，他晃开出击的门将后获得空间起脚射门，但在门线上被防守球员解围出去。
第30分钟，卡瓦哈尔送出精准传中，贝尔高高跃起头球攻门，顶高了，错失良机。3分钟后，皇马扳平比分！无人盯防的伊斯科在禁区内左侧凌空抽射，打了一个反弹球直入球门，门将一点办法都没有。第38分钟，皇马又进球了！卡塞米罗头球顶向门前，拉莫斯轻松头球接力顶进空门！皇马在5分钟内连进2球反超比分！半场结束，皇马2-1奥萨苏纳。
下半场易边再战。第50分钟，莫德里奇在禁区内抢球的时候与对手发生身体碰撞倒地，裁判没有任何表示。第69分钟，伊斯科在禁区线上凌空抽射，门将扑球脱手，瓦拉内上前补射，面对一个大大的球门，瓦拉内的补射竟然直接打在门将身上弹出，真是难以置信。皇马错失了继续扩大比分的机会。第83分钟，巴斯克斯接到本泽马的传球推射破门！全场补时阶段，约维奇凌空爆射破门！最终，皇马以4-1逆转战胜奥萨苏纳。
0-1爆冷！西甲又1神剧本：升班马被罚下2人，靠乌龙球赢了
一直以为意甲联赛才是神剧本最多的联赛，不过，看完今日凌晨的这场西甲比赛，相信你会对这一观点有所改变了。在今日凌晨，毕尔巴鄂竞技与升班马加的斯踢出了一场导演都编不出来的比赛：毕尔巴鄂竞技在11打9的情况下，竟然打进了一粒乌龙球对手爆冷自己！作为西甲一直以硬朗踢法闻名的毕尔巴鄂，这场比赛他们输得真是令球迷匪夷所思。
毕尔巴鄂虽然在西甲算不上绝对的强队，但是他们的球风非常硬朗，即便是像巴萨和和皇马这样的豪门，在对阵他们时，也占不到多少便宜。在新赛季的2场比赛，毕尔巴鄂表现中规中矩，首轮比赛他们0-2不敌格拉纳达。上轮客场与埃瓦尔的比赛，他们也赢得非常艰难，直到比赛第87分钟，才由洛佩斯完成绝杀！
今晚与升班马加的斯的比赛，毕尔巴鄂无论是球队实力，还是状态都在对手之上，加上有主场作战的优势，怎么看他们都是赢球机会更大的一方。更为有利的是，比赛下半场刚开场4分钟，对手就被红牌罚下一人，毕尔巴鄂获得了11打10的利好局面。
然而，比赛第57分钟，上轮比赛完成梅开二度的洛佩斯竟然打进了一粒离奇的乌龙球加的斯奇迹般取得1-0领先！不过，比赛第70分钟，加的斯再次遭到打击，内格雷多再次被红牌罚下，这一次他们虽然1-0领先，但是面临9打11的局面。
估计不少球迷都在期盼着毕尔巴鄂扳平比分吧，11打9，怎么着至少也能拿1分吧。比较遗憾，随后的比赛，毕尔巴鄂浑然不在状态，多次进攻机会被对手化解。最终他们在11打9，全场数据碾压对手的情况下，0-1爆出惊天大冷，也踢出了一场让球迷大开眼界的神剧本。
本场比赛有多离奇，或许数据就能证明一切，威胁进攻：毕尔巴鄂87-25加的斯；射门次数：毕尔巴鄂18-6加的斯；控球率：毕尔巴鄂65%-35%加的斯；传球：毕尔巴鄂505-205加的斯。他们就是在这样的一边倒的优势下，爆冷比赛的。
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